V

"I won't get mad if you say I look fat."

Not so much a lie as a trap. No matter what you say, she will get angry. If you try to tell her that she looks great, she'll accuse you of lying to make her feel better, on the other hand, if you tell her that she has, in fact, put on a couple of pounds, you're likely to set off a war in your living room. Advice: The only way to deal with this situation (short of faking a heart attack) is to brace yourself and wait until the monsoon passes.